Posted by Eric Polsky on Tuesday, June 30, 2009 at 5:06 am

Michael Jackson’s white and silver jeweled glove was just one component of the iconic persona that made him the most famous person of my generation. The following is a list of people who used a different type of glove (some which were Golden) on the way to their fame. This list is of the most famous and recognizeable baseball players of the last 30 years, with some of Michael’s songs mixed in:

1. “The Word Is Out
You’re Doin’ Wrong
Gonna Lock You Up
Before Too Long,
Your Lyin’ Eyes
Gonna Take You Right
So Listen Up
Don’t Make A Fight…

…And The Whole World Has To Answer Right Now
Just To Tell You Once Again,
Who’s Bad?”

“Bad” Barry Bonds (Pirates 1986-1992, Giants 1993-2007)
Well, this is allegedly what Barry wanted, right? One theory as to why he “might” have used performance-enhancing drugs was that he was jealous of the likes of Mark McGwire, Sammy Sosa and Ken Griffey, Jr. smashing the homerun records.  Barry supposedly wanted fame, by whatever means necessary. Everyone is familiar with the allegations and the scandals, and that’s why he’s tops on this list.  The “Good”: a record seven MVP awards, fourteen All-Star appearances, eight Gold Gloves, 40-40 and 500-500 clubs,  record holder in single season homeruns with 73 and career homeruns with 762, and countless other records. The “Bad”: the steroids/BALCO scandal, negative relationships with the media, fans and teammates. The “Ugly”: the asterisk branded on Bonds’ record setting homerun ball and possibly branded next to his feats in the record book. 

2. “So, Annie are you ok?
Are you ok Annie?
You’ve been hit by
You’ve been hit by-
A Smooth Criminal”

“Smooth Criminal” Alex Rodriguez  (Mariners 1994-2000, Rangers 2001-2003, Yankees 2004 – Present)
This article’s about the King of Pop, but when you’re allegedly dating the Queen of Pop, and the story is more about you than Madonna, then you’re kinda famous. A-Rod hit the mainstream as a promising youngster with the Mariners and then rocked the world with his record setting $252 million contract with Texas.  His career achievements include three MVP awards, two Gold Gloves, twelve All-Star selections, and within the next five to seven years he’ll attempt to surpass Bonds in the homerun and other statistical categories.  Also by that time, A-Rod will have surpassed Bonds on this list.  But following his admission to using PEDs, A-Rod hasn’t been as vilified by the media and fans as Bonds and other steroid era bombers have been. This makes A-Rod a very smooth criminal.

3. “I’ve been a victim of
A selfish kind of love
Its time that I realize…

…I’m Starting With The Man In The Mirror
I’m Asking Him To Change His Ways

Rocket “Man In the Mirror” Roger Clemens (Red Sox 1984-96, Blue Jays 97-98, Yankees 99-03, 07, Astros 04-06) 
Brett Favre’s played out the retirement/un-retirement saga well, but Clemens set the standard. The “Rocket Man” first “retired” in 2003 after a World Series loss with the Yankees to the Marlins. Prior to the 2004 season, Clemens then un-retired and (selfishly?) signed a one-year contract for his hometown Houston Astros where he would be able to play with close friend Andy Pettitte.  Clemens then (selfishly) played that same retirement game for the next three seasons, retiring at the end of 2004, 2005 and 2006 only to un-retire each time, the final time being most memorable, as he made a comeback announcement during a seventh inning stretch in Yankee stadium.  Clemens is one of the most decorated pitchers in baseball history, with his record seven Cy Young awards.  Boston fans were the victims of his love, as he left for Toronto after an infamous rift with management. Most recently, Clemens’ involvement in Congressional hearings on the steroid scandal have caused the names Brian McNamee and Rusty Hardin to become household names, and has left everyone asking “Who was at Jose Canseco’s party?” Clemens’ shady denials of the steroid allegations have left many also asking Clemens to look in the mirror and change his ways.

4. “You start to freeze as horror looks you right between the eyes 
You’re paralyzed
Cause this is thriller, thriller night
And no one’s gonna save you from the beast about to strike”

“Thriller” Randy Johnson (Expos 1988-89, Mariners 1989-1998, Astros 1998, Diamondbacks 1999-2004 and 2007-08, Yankees 2005-06, Giants 2009)
Perhaps no player in the game is more recognizable than the “Big Unit”, with his 6-feet 10-inch height, long hair and nasty glare. After signing with the Yankees in 2005, he couldn’t even walk down the streets of New York peacefully, as he notably had a confrontation with a cameraman. Baseball fans also recognize and appreciate his accomplishments: five Cy Young awards, member of the 300 win club, league leader in strikeouts nine times, two no hitters (one a perfect game). Birds also take notice and are horrified of him. Randy famously killed a bird with a fastball in a spring training game in 2001. John Kruk and Larry Walker are not birds, but they too are afraid of RJ, after they were frozen in their classic All-Star game at-bats when Randy sailed fastballs over their heads.

5. “Keep On With The Force, Don’t
Don’t Stop ‘Til You Get Enough…
…I’m Melting
Like Hot Candle Wax…
Keep On With The Force Don’t,
Don’t Stop ‘Til You Get Enough”

“Don’t stop til you get enough” Ken Griffey, Jr. (Mariners 1989-99 and 2009, Reds 2000-08, White Sox 2008)
The way his career began, its surprising that it has turned out that Junior is not number one on this list. Everyone either has Griffey’s 1989 Upper Deck baseball card, had it and sold it, or knows what it looks like and what it was worth at one point in time.  Injuries melted his body and derailed his career, taking him off the course for Bonds-level numbers.  Despite the injuries, Griffey stands at number five on the all time homerun list, and also sports a resume that includes the 1997 MVP Award, thirteen All Star appearances and ten Gold Gloves.  But perhaps the thing that separates Junior from the other sluggers of this era is his avoidance of PEDs. If he had joined the crowd and taken them, maybe the injuries wouldn’t have occurred, as often as they did, and maybe we’d have seen more of him while he set statistical records of his own.  Instead, he’s finishing his career in Seattle, and not stopping ‘til he gets enough.

6. “Billie Jean Is Always Talkin’
When Nobody Else Is Talkin’
Tellin’ Lies And Rubbin’ Shoulders
So They Called Her Mouth A Motor
Someone’s Always Tryin’ To Start My Baby Cryin’
Talkin’, Squealin’, Spyin’
Sayin’ You Just Wanna Be Startin’ Somethin’”

“Wanna Be Startin’ Somethin” Pedro Martinez (Dodgers 1992-93, Expos 1994-97, Red Sox 1998-2004, Mets 2005-2008)
Pedro’s memorable as much for his talkin’ as he is for his dominant pitching performances. Pedro won three Cy Young awards, was an eight time All Star, and won the title with Red Sox in 04.  Pedro certainly started somethin’ with the Yankees several times. On one famous occasion after a game in 2001, Pedro said “I’m starting to hate talking about the Yankees…Maybe they should wake up the Bambino and have him face me and maybe I’ll drill him.”  He also started somethin’ when called the Yankees his “daddy”, “fought” with Yankees’ coach Don Zimmer, and taunted in an interview: “Who are YOU, Karim Garcia, to try to test Pedro Martinez, a proven player for ten years?”  Pedro’s also memorable for allowing the Yankees to tie the score on four hits in the eighth inning of a Game 7 loss in the 2003 ALCS.  But only a player with the status of Pedro Martinez could get away with that relatively unscathed while his manager Grady Little took the blame for not pulling him sooner.

7. “A B C, easy as one, two, three
Are simple as do re mi
A B C, one, two, three, baby you and me girl”

“A B C” Greg Maddux (Cubs 1986-92 and 2004-06, Braves 1993-2003, Dodgers 2006 and 2008, Padres 2007-08)
Maddux has made the best use of the pitching ABC’s in baseball history, able to pinpoint a pitch and finish innings 1-2-3 with his control and knowledge of opposing hitters’ tendencies. The simplicity led Maddux to four Cy Young awards, eight All Star appearances, eighteen Gold Gloves, 300+ wins, and World Series ring in 1995 with Atlanta.  Maddux famously told Sports Illustrated: “You talk to Sandy Koufax, Bob Gibson, or Tom Seaver. They’ll all tell you the same thing. It’s not your arm that makes you a great pitcher. It’s that thing between both of your ears we call a brain.” That doesn’t mean he was all nerd though; he and fellow teammate Tom Glavine (honorable mention, below) did make everyone aware that “Chicks Dig The Long Ball”

8. “I’ll reach out my hand to you.
I’ll have faith in all you do.
Just call my name
and I’ll be there.”

“I’ll be there,” says Cal Ripken, Jr. (Orioles 1981-2001)
Ripken’s record 2,632 consecutive games played earned him the Iron Man nickname, and his victory lap after breaking Lou Gehrig’s streak seemed to last just a few moments shorter than the entirety of the streak itself.  In a poll on MLB.com conducted in 2007, fans voted Ripken’s 2,131’s consecutive game as MLB’s Most Memorable Moment. Ripken was a nineteen-time All Star, two-time MVP, two-time Gold Glove winner, World Series winner in 1983, and member of the 3,000 hit club. He was one of the rare athletes in this era to play his entire career with the same organization; a 20 year career at that. All the Orioles had to do was just call his name, and he’d be there.

9. “They Told Him Don’t You Ever Come Around Here
Don’t Wanna See Your Face, You Better Disappear
The Fire’s In Their Eyes And Their
Words Are Really Clear
So Beat It, Just Beat It”

“Beat It” Sammy Sosa (Rangers 1989 and 2007, White Sox 1990-1991, Cubs 1992-2004, Orioles 2005)
Sammy burst into the mainstream with his single season homerun record chase with Mark McGwire in 1998, which also helped to bring Major League Baseball back into the mainstream after its 1994 strike.  With the Cubs, Sosa was a fan favorite, a seven time All-Star, an MVP winner in 1998, and he currently stands at sixth all time in homeruns.  But as the Cubs continued to fail in the playoffs, and after scandals involving Sosa’s use of a corked bat, the Cubs told Sosa to “beat it” and traded him to the Orioles. Sosa was also involved in the steroid scandal and a recent report alleged that he failed a drug test in 2003. Sammy recently told ESPNdeportes that he’s going to announce his retirement soon and “calmly wait for [his] induction into the Baseball Hall of Fame.” This was not a smart thing for Sammy to say, as it’s somewhat clear that baseball doesn’t wanna see his face right now, and he’d better disappear before the scandal gets the best of him, too.

10. “Tired of injustice
Tired of the schemes
The lies are disgusting
So what does it mean
Kicking me down
I got to get up
As jacked as it sounds
The whole system sucks”

Scream – Mark McGwire (Athletics 1986-1997, Cardinals 1997-2001)
McGwire’s career began as a “Bash Brother” with Jose Canseco on the A’s and their World Championship team in 1989.  McGwire “grew” from there and was a twelve time All-Star on his way to eighth on the career homerun list, and setting the single season homerun record with 70 in 1998.  But McGwire was the first player to be targeted in this era for drug use, as he admitted following the 1998 homerun chase to testing positive for the drug “Andro”, which was legal under MLB rules. Then, McGwire famously told Congress in the 2005 Congressional hearings on steroids that he wasn’t here “to talk about the past” and danced around questions. McGwire’s alleged lies about his drug use has caused fans to want to “Scream” with the feeling that everything about MLB’s system during the steroid era “sucks”. It certainly “sucks” that five of the top ten players on this list are involved in this scandal, and that steroids and PEDs have tainted what is most memorable about Major League Baseball in my lifetime.

Here’s a quick listing of my next ten, followed by some honorable mentions:

11. Manny Ramirez – “Billie Jean…caused a scene” Rapidly climbing this list and should crack the top ten within the next few years.
12. Derek Jeter – It doesn’t matter if you’re “Black or White”. Also climbing the list.
13. David Ortiz – “The Way You Make Me Feel”
14. Frank Thomas – With the White Sox, he was “Rockin’” with “Robin” Ventura
15. Rickey Henderson – “Never Can Say Goodbye”
16. Ichiro Suzuki – “We Are the World”
17. Mike Piazza – “Somebody’s Watchin Me”
18. Tony Gwynn – “Human Nature”
19. Ozzie Smith – “He’s the Wizard”
20. Nolan Ryan – “Remember the Time”

Honorable mention (in no particular order): Tom Glavine, John Smoltz, Chipper Jones, Mariano Rivera, Jose Canseco, Dwight Gooden, Darryl Strawberry, Barry Larkin, Josh Beckett, Carlos Delgado, Gary Sheffield, Kirby Puckett, Edgar Martinez, Paul Molitor, Will Clark, Jorge Posada, Francisco Rodriguez, Trevor Hoffman, George Brett, Eddie Murray, Dave Winfield, Dennis Eckersley, Mike Schmidt, Pete Rose, Wade Boggs, Ryne Sandberg, Curt Schilling, Jeff Bagwell, Craig Biggio, Johan Santana, Vladimir Guerrero, Ivan Rodriguez, Roberto Alomar, Albert Belle, Andre Dawson, Jeff Kent, Albert Pujols, CC Sabathia, Jim Thome

Finally, here’s a group of “Pretty Young Things” that could find their way onto the list someday: Hanley Ramirez, Jose Reyes, Evan Longoria, Miguel Cabrera, David Wright, Grady Sizemore, Joe Mauer, Dustin Pedroia, Ryan Braun, Tim Lincecum, Felix Hernandez, Steven Strasburg (just kidding)

Special thanks to http://www.mp3lyrics.org/m/michael-jackson/ for the lyrics.